A to Z of Period Properties

[Feltwell]

LIME - citrus fruit that mixes well with gin and tonic. Often taken medicinally when admiring one's handiwork at the end of a long day.

I confess that is one alcoholic drink that I have never sampled. At the end of a day's hard work I usually just want a cup of tea!

 

[Nigel Watts]

LAPSANG SOUCHONG perhaps?

 

[Feltwell]

Lapdog Shoesnog????

Sorry Nigel, too cultured for me. Tetley or PG Tips will do just fine, so long as it's made nice & strong!

 

[Penners]

LOST: Any tool that is immediately required for a job.

:lol: :lol: :lol:

See also FOUND: any tool that you've just replaced at considerable expense.

 

[Penners]

LOAD BEARING WALL, supports part of the building, in period properties usually constructed without input from a structural engineer or computer.

Alternatively...

LOAD BEARING WALL: the pile of rubble that you've just created in order to have an open-plan living area.

 

[Penners]

LIP SERVICE: the assurances given to a Conservation Officer that you would never carry out any work to a listed building without the required consents.

 

[christianb]

LOAD BEARING WALL: the pile of rubble that you've just created in order to have an open-plan living area.

LOAD BEARING WALL: that which is invariably knocked out by slackwitted 'home-improvers' on account that they've seen it done on the telly by just about everyone trying to 'renovate' a property.

 

[christianb]

LUMP HAMMER: A universal whacking tool ideal for tapping small picture hooks into walls when you can't be arsed to go the the shed and get a pin hammer.

 

[Penners]

Christian - have you been spying on me?

 

[christianb]

Christian - have you been spying on me?

... remember the rustling bushes??

 

[Penners]

LINTEL: the horizontal supporting member that's missing from above that sagging window-frame.



A definition that will ring bells with at least one forum member of my acquaintance. :wink:

 

[Flyfisher]

Indeed it will, er, it does.

 

[robgil]

yup , my extension is slowly breaking in half because of this.

L is also for 'Long' , which is the length of time most things take to do , my door for instance , i am still at it.

 

[christianb]

LINTEL: the horizontal supporting member that's missing from above that sagging window-frame.

Not to be confused with the South African version of a particular soup.

 

[Feltwell]

Not to be confused with the South African version of a particular soup.

I like that!

Lots - an estimate of the amount of money required to complete most jobs on old houses.

 

[Penners]

LATER: a word intended the explain the urgency with which any particular job needs to be tackled.

 

[FamilyWiggs]

LAUGH, you're havin' a. Response of most non-period builders (accompanied by sucking in of teeth) when asked to quaote for work that does not involve cement, plasterboard, or expanding foam.

 

[Flyfisher]

Also:

LAUGH, you're havin' a. Response of most period property owners to specialist period builders (accompanied by frantic grasping for a chair) when receiving a quote for work that does not involve cement, plasterboard, or expanding foam.

 

[Feltwell]

LIFTING - something you should do very carefully if you don't want to end up with a bad back, like Penners.

 

[robgil]

'Listen' , which is what a lot of builders dont seem to be capable of when you try to explain to them that your required building work should not include cement, plasterboard, or expanding foam.