Graham's Top Tips

[thiambal]

Top Tip No 6.

The belt sander may be making disappointing progress on the piece of wood, but don't be tempted to wedge your thumb in between the moving belt and the casing.

Belt sanders go through thumbs much quicker than wood!

 

[Matt Green]

"There's NO dry-rot in that house at all," even if he is a chartered surveyor and therefore qualified to make such proclamations.

:shock:

 

[Penners]

Belt sanders go through thumbs much quicker than wood!

Oooh! That one made me shudder.

 

[Penners]

Penners' Top Tip to himself:

Get off the bloody computer and get on with your work!

 

[wobs]

OK - top tip from the Wild East this afternoon:

Never place your cup of coffee near the paint tin into which you are regularly dipping your brush.

-I'm amazed I have never done this.

Top Tip from Hull:
When routing a sash window frame with thin original glass in it, and the router jams for some unknown reason, do not let go of the router, no matter how certain you are that it's balanced and stopped. It WILL tilt onto the glass and break it.

 

[thiambal]

Penners wrote:
OK - top tip from the Wild East this afternoon:

Never place your cup of coffee near the paint tin into which you are regularly dipping your brush.

Oh, I have done this one. And it wasn't even my cup of tea.

 

[Nimster]

At this time of year, after spending a cold day on the scaffolding you'll want a nice warming stew, soup or casserole. When making your delicious stock as the base for this,
DON'T
Place a colander in the sink and drain the contents of your saucepan through it
BECAUSE
a. all you'll have left is some bones and a damp bouquet garni
AND
b. your friends will never let you forget it
AND
c. their small children will pick up interesting expressions of dismay which they may be tempted to use on inappropriate occasions.

I've done this too. I remember standing looking at the steaming sink with a colander full of scraps, thinking "bugger".

 

[Schoolmarm]

I am loving this thread muchly 8)

 

[Penners]

I agree, Marm. It's great! I keep reading the posts out to Mrs P, and she replies "Oh, I've done that" to every single one!

 

[elm]

When loading lengths of wood into itty bitty hatchbacks, check that the ends are not pressing against the windscreen before vigourously slamming the boot closed ......

 

[yoofookinwah]

In an area of the house trying to hit a nail in I could not hold it, swing and hit it with my Estwing. I asked my nephew to help. Willing helper picks up the hammer...

Me "When I nod my head, hit it"

Nods head

Nephew whacks my head...

It still makes me laugh.

 

[Nemesis]

Makes you laugh???

We have to think that's cos it did some damage...

 

[Jane Smith]

I agree, Marm. It's great! I keep reading the posts out to Mrs P, and she replies "Oh, I've done that" to every single one!

Penners, what she actually says is, "Oh, you've done that," to every single one. Listen properly next time.

 

[Geoff Flegg]

When cutting out a first floor joist, do not then get distracted by a mobile phone call and stand on the unsupported end of the bit you've just cut....

 

[Schoolmarm]

if this carries on I think a little book needs publishing

 

[Becka]

I'm sure I have so many, but heres one that sticks in the mind for sheer pain..

When trying to extract a rather crappy plasterboard nail from a rather strong beam, be careful not to hold the a claw hammer at such an angle that when the head of the nail inevitable crumples the head of the hammer flies straight back into your nose.. Got a rather ominous crunch, and emergency trip to the docs at 5pm on good friday and an interesting dent in my right nasal bone learning that lesson

 

[skier-hughes]

if this carries on I think a little book needs publishing

So anyone have any publishing friends?

A cartoonist who will draw for free. I know one, but would want paying.

Proceeds to go to someone like SPAB?

I could make some enquiries as a couple of my friends have written technical books.

 

[thiambal]

Picture the scene.....

Have drilled through a floorboard, want to know where the hole is from underneath once drill is removed, so put finger on end of the drill bit and withdraw the drill so finger ends up on hole. Remove the drill half way and bit gets wedged in hole.......

solution......give the drill a quick buzz to free the bit........cannot see finger still on end of bit so brain does not register it is there.

result......drill into end of finger.

Lesson, just because you cannot see fingers, does not mean they are not there.

Same lesson applies to circular saws!!!

 

[Penners]

In an area of the house trying to hit a nail in I could not hold it, swing and hit it with my Estwing. I asked my nephew to help. Willing helper picks up the hammer...

Me "When I nod my head, hit it"

Nods head

Nephew whacks my head....

With apologies to The Goon Show, 1961.

 

[Penners]

I agree, Marm. It's great! I keep reading the posts out to Mrs P, and she replies "Oh, I've done that" to every single one!

Penners, what she actually says is, "Oh, you've done that," to every single one. Listen properly next time.

How come you know my wife so well?