The Grumpy Old Git thread.

[robgil]

halfords think my land rover doesn't exist! ''its parked outside though'' , ''it cant be , its not in our book''. :shock:

 

[Pford75]

e bay people who charge £4.70 2nd class parcel shipping then add £7.50 for fuel to get to the post office , £1.50 wear and tear for the car , £300 for going out in the rain and 2.5 hours of their time at £15 per hour with £20 minimum charge for the first half hour.
so , door knocker = 99p , postage = 7 billion pounds.

Ebay purchasers who demand immediate postge costs (when it is 20miles to the nearest post office) and then complain that the postage cost was £1.89 instead of the £1.99 they paid. (they seem to think that the jiffy bag, travel to the post office, parking in town and my time are all without value!)

 

[Pford75]

Second grump of the day......it's 46 degrees here in Riyadh, i'm wearing a suit and the taxi driver seems to think it's too chilly for the air conditioning. :x

 

[FamilyWiggs]

halfords think my land rover doesn't exist! ''its parked outside though'' , ''it cant be , its not in our book''. :shock:

I trust you then engaged the teenage girl (for it always is in Halfords these days) checkout operator in a detailed discussion of existentialist philosophy, with a little detour into Cartesian principles before winding up in phenomenology?

Alternatively explain to her that the front half is a Sierra, the back half a Landrover, the plates are stolen and you bought it off a bloke down the pub. That's why it's not in her book. :lol:

 

[Penners]

Now, FW, let's be serious about this. Cartesian materialism (although not attributable to Rene himself) postulates that there is a place in the brain which would store a recoverable representation of everything that we conciously experience.

You can see the glaring flaw in your suggestion, can't you?

".....brain....."

 

[FamilyWiggs]

Extending cogito, said girl is merely a construct of my imagination - therefore the absence of a brain is not too much of a handicap!

 

[Schoolmarm]

Robin, sellers on ebay can't leave negs for buyers. 8)

 

[Penners]

Extending cogito, said girl is merely a construct of my imagination - therefore the absence of a brain is not too much of a handicap!

But likewise, Rob's Land Rover is merely a construct of his imagination. So the Halfords book is correct.

QED

 

[FamilyWiggs]

But in reality (well, my reality) I've only invented all of you to amuse me for a while.

You'll all be gone when I sober up shortly....

 

[LadyArowana]

But in reality (well, my reality) I've only invented all of you to amuse me for a while.

You'll all be gone when I sober up shortly....

Would you mind inventing me ten pounds lighter please? and with an orange ostrich skin Birkin in the wardrobe?

 

[Penners]

Just for you Yer Ladyship, since we're talking about constructs of the imagination, imagine yourself clutching this ...

 

[Nigel Watts]

Or perhaps this:

 

[wobs]

e bay people who charge £4.70 2nd class parcel shipping then add £7.50 for fuel to get to the post office , £1.50 wear and tear for the car , £300 for going out in the rain and 2.5 hours of their time at £15 per hour with £20 minimum charge for the first half hour.
so , door knocker = 99p , postage = 7 billion pounds.

Ebay purchasers who demand immediate postge costs (when it is 20miles to the nearest post office) and then complain that the postage cost was £1.89 instead of the £1.99 they paid. (they seem to think that the jiffy bag, travel to the post office, parking in town and my time are all without value!)

Or you could order the Hitch-Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy from:
Mega-Dodo Publications
Mega-Dodo House
Ursa-Minor

Sending £3.95 for the book, and £597,000,000,812,406.07* postage & packaging.

* UK billion, as recognised in all fashionable corners of the universe.

 

[LadyArowana]

Thankyou Mr P and Nigel, I love those bags! getting one would turn his Lordship into a grumpy old git when he found out why my bank account was empty though.

 

[philpjuk100]

Grumpy

 

[Penners]

you could order the Hitch-Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy from:
Mega-Dodo Publications
Mega-Dodo House
Ursa-Minor

Sending £3.95 for the book, and £597,000,000,812,406.07* postage & packaging.

* UK billion, as recognised in all fashionable corners of the universe.

No, I'm sorry, but that won't work. There are only three currencies in the known universe.

The Altarian Dollar has recently collapsed, the Flainian Pobble Bead is only exchangeable for other Flainian Pobble Beads, and the Triganic Pu has its own very special problems. Its exchange rate of eight Ningis to one Pu is simple enough, but since Ningi is a triangular rubber coin six thousand eight hundred miles along each side, no one has ever collected enough to own one Pu. Nigis are not negotiable currency, because Galactibanks refuse to deal in fiddling small change.

From this basic premise it is very simple to prove that the Galactibanks are also the product of FamilyWiggs' deranged imagination.

 

[Schoolmarm]

Grumpy?maybe! new neighbours preparing to move into the 400 year old grade two house next door told me today that he has just purchased some "nice new doors" from homebase to replace the old ones "made out of old planks"! he had a delivery from Jewsons of big builders bags of sand and portland cement,quite a lot.Says he will have it "nice" before he moves in,new roof in pantiles,I mentioned the CO and he said "Im just doing it up"! phil.

You have to ring and report him :shock:

 

[philpjuk100]

But

 

[Schoolmarm]

Neighbour! schmayber!!


Meaningless, he could destroy 400 years worth of house then move away. Please ring the CO.


Pretty please 8)

 

[Penners]

ring the CO.

Seconded.

Or if you don't want to do it, PM me the full details and I'll do it.