Graham's Top Tips

[Cloudscape]

Carpet grippers and knees... yes that hurts.

What strangely doesn't hurt is trying to seal the end of a gushing 15mm pipe with your hand, after you thought the pipe was empty and you didn't have a bowl and you'd just used a pipe cutter. I had no idea I was gushing too, until the water stopped flowing. Cut pipe is razor sharp.

Another one I didn't think through was trying to loosen a frozen screw in a small metal block (big screwdriver in right hand, metal block in left). I sprayed WD40 on the screw and tried again. Very slippy stuff that WD40 and I nearly went right through my hand.

We live and learn... just not much. :wink:

 

[Flyfisher]

and I nearly went right through my hand.

Easily done, especially in the school chemistry lab when you're trying to push a glass tube through a tight test-tube bung and the glass tube breaks :shock:

Still it healed surprisingly quickly and the scars are barely visible - just a small one each side of the hand.

 

[FamilyWiggs]

It may be genetic...

My mother's top tip is:

Remember to unplug the drill from the mains if you are going to change the drill bit standing up and resting the drill on your leg.

[/b]Because when you accidentally squeeze the trigger with the chuck key still in the drill, the flesh between your thumb and forefinger provides surprisingly little resistance.

I'm not sure she ever did find all of the missing flap of skin....

 

[FamilyWiggs]

Will I ever get the bl**dy bold text correct?

 

[MdB]

There is an edit button, so you can sort it out.

 

[Moo]

In order to get words or phrases in bold, I have to select (highlight) them and then click on the B button. I can't imagine what tricks your machine is playing on you, but suggest that you treat it as attention-getting behaviour and just stick to plain text for a while.

 

[DaveBrigg]

If the room in which you spend late nights on the computer has generously spaced floorboards, and is directly above a well ventilated cellar, you may notice your toes going numb before you've got to the end of the emails. One solution is to carefully cut insulation to fit between the joists in the cellar, and hold it in place with a series of wooden battens. It's a tricky job to hold the insulation up with one hand whilst screwing the batten with the other, but at the end of the day the floor has been draughtproofed and insulated, without any alteration to the appearance of the room above.

It is always however, good policy to save your holiday pictures from the digital camera memory card immediately, and certainly before turning your back on a four year-old with great curiosity but slippery fingers, since stripping out the aforementioned insulation to search for the card after it has fallen through the gaps in the floorboards is one of the least productive ways of spending a Sunday afternoon.

 

[Nemesis]

Hmmmm. Thankfully I can load directly from the camera. The gaps in our boards aren't quite as large as a Canon.

 

[FamilyWiggs]

When draining the central heating system, always rememer to retighten the bleed screw in the higest radiator before refilling the system whilst taking a break to watch Eastenders, because the volume of water that leaks out in a 26 minute episode seriously impedes the drying out of new lime plaster on the wall of the room below.

:roll:

 

[Lime]

When standing on the top of steps remember which side the steps are particularly if they have been turned around to fit into a difficult space.

Also, along the same lines, when normally working on a ladder remember when you are on the scaffolding.

 

[Penners]

If the room in which you spend late nights on the computer has generously spaced floorboards, and is directly above a well ventilated cellar, you may notice your toes going numb before you've got to the end of the emails.

Another good way of making your toes go numb is to abuse your back so much that you develop sciatica.

Trouble is, it can take years for them to become un-numb again. If they ever do.

Be warned.

 

[shelli]

When smashing up rotten old roof battens to burn on the fire ensure that the side with the long nails in is facing down.
That way when you resort to kung foo leg power to break them, the side with the nail in doesn't jump up and smash into the side of your head, narrowly missing your eye and causing lots of red sauce to escape.

Heads don't half bleed a lot!!

 

[skier-hughes]

Ouch........

Or go straight through your wellie and into the nice cushioned bit on the base of your foot!!!!

 

[Penners]

That's exactly what it's cushioned for.

 

[vicky whitworth]

Before nailing down upstairs floorboards check that all cats have been located before securing the last board. Otherwise, after a few hours, the mewing becomes pitiful. What is it with cats and curiousity?

 

[Gareth Hughes]

Before nailing down upstairs floorboards check that all cats have been located before securing the last board. Otherwise, after a few hours, the mewing becomes pitiful. What is it with cats and curiousity?

Keeps the evil spirits out though...
http://www.apotropaios.co.uk/dried_cats.htm

 

[plumbers mate]

Well, that about dried cats has well and truly put me off my lunch...

 

[FamilyWiggs]

Before nailing down upstairs floorboards check that all cats have been located before securing the last board. Otherwise, after a few hours, the mewing becomes pitiful. What is it with cats and curiousity?

But to be fair, the sound dies down after a few days, and then it's only the smell you have to worry about...

 

[Moo]

The smell doesn't last forever, either. And in years to come the new owners of your house will be able to invent some interesting theories as to why the cat was put there (probably something about warding off witches.....).

 

[Penners]

interesting theories as to why the cat was put there (probably something about warding off witches.....).

Then I imagine we must have a dessicated cat somewhere in the structure of our house, because I simply can't remember when I last saw a witch.