Electric fences, big dogs, guns

[Edwardia]

I ask myself, why would anyone buy an isolated house that had bars on the windows, knowing that the previous owner needed a shotgun ?

However I would suggest asking for planning permission (if necessary) to erect fencing to keep dogs on property and therefore not endangering public on footpaths (specifically word it in that way) and dog kennels to house them. Hide great thick spiky hedge in 'and associated landscaping'. Make sure you have signs up on property boundaries Beware of Dog, which then covers you if dogs maul em on yer front lawn. Slippery paint on all downpipes. Keep ladders and tools locked away. Bolt and padlock or concrete planters in situ. Let dogs roam all the time. Keep doors locked even when home.

 

[Gareth Hughes]

Sorry, but the more you look as if you've got something to hide (and therefore, possibly, something worth nicking), or are an eccentric loon the harassing of whom will provide an hour's entertainment, the more likely you are to be the victim of this sort of trouble.
At least make the place look lived in and cared for first.

 

[Feltwell]

If the idea of dogs really doesn't appeal but you fancy the idea of keeping animals (and probably not having a nice garden!), geese make very effective guards. Quite territorial, but maybe you don't think they're scary? Try upsetting one, you'll quickly change your mind!

Farm next to where I grew up had them, vicious brutes when they wanted to be. Sounds eccentric but keeping geese as guards is not a new idea at all.

 

[JoceAndChris]

Sorry, but the more you look as if you've got something to hide (and therefore, possibly, something worth nicking), or are an eccentric loon the harassing of whom will provide an hour's entertainment, the more likely you are to be the victim of this sort of trouble. At least make the place look lived in and cared for first.

I ask myself, why would anyone buy an isolated house that had bars on the windows, knowing that the previous owner needed a shotgun ?

Mr Knightley has spoken; all Emmas take heed!

Well, Edwardia, if you had seen it...

And I didn't hear the shotgun story til so much later, and the rest of the story (from a dog-walker) about the vendetta, the quad bikes, the mutilated chickens. The bars are mainly great iron things that you snap up when you close the shutters on the inside, so I didn't see those either.

But thank you for all the helpful suggestions and the genuine concern. "Lived in and cared for", yes. I'm thinking of advertising free allotment space for dear little old men to come and grow vegetables for me in return for cups of tea and friendly chat.

Geese, yes. Husband likes geese. (Strange man)

 

[another_richard]

Having seen it from both sides, the victim and the perpetrator of the anti-social menace we used to enjoy annoying Lord Derby's groundsmen. They used to shoot at us with a blunderbuss filled with peppercorn, we only wanted the phesants.

Whatever you do do not antagonise them as they will see you as a kind of nightly entertainment.

As a victim, father ex-policeman on a very rough council estate, we went through 2 generations of vandalism (a generation being 12 years). I longed for an MG42 so I could cut them in half.

Try cpturing them and the applying chloroform then sterilise the little...

Do you own a vat or old bath of acid?

 

[Moo]

I agree with the couple but skip over the puppies (far too much work) and get a couple of rescue dogs.

Under normal circumstances I, too, would have suggested rescue dogs. But in this case there is a bad case of dog-phobia to overcome, hence the puppies.
Geese is a splendid idea, but why not get the pups as well - that way you'd have multiple guards, but the dogs would be excellent company for you during those long periods of solitude.

What breed?
Personally, I'd try to find labrador/german shepherd crosses. All the gentleness of the lab + the protective instincts of the g.shepherd.

 

[CHRIS]

Whatever you do do not antagonise them as they will see you as a kind of nightly entertainment.

This is oh so very true!

If you have time for training some dogs how about a pair of Border Collies they are fantastic dogs and when they get going can be very scarry indead! I have also had Jack russels and are great as well, both breeds make great pets as well if you have the time but think long and hard if it your first dog as they change your life (for the better I think). I would go the rescue route as well but the RSPCA places are very strict if you go to them so prepare for 1000 questions.

I remember being in a certain hospital in Leatherhead many years ago on crutches and they had geese wandering around the grounds - they were vicious B******Ds and would take great delight in attacking all the slow moving sicknotes - I think it was all part of the physiotherapy training and soon got you moving again.

 

[Ushy M]

Joce, I understand your predicament - when we moved into our house we discovered that the local yoof had been using our garden as a shortcut to to get to the houses at the back of the village (and as a good place to hang out drinking vodka and smoking weed). We repaired/replaced the broken-down fencing and planted hawthorn and rosa rugosa, as well as encouraging existing brambles to grow along the fence top as a kind of nature's barbed wire. Where there was no planting, we also used (on the suggestion of our local crime prevention officer) this stuff: http://www.prikka-strip.com/. So far, this has (fingers crossed) been pretty effective. I think sometimes with sufficient discouragement they just get out of the habit of using a particular place to misbehave. Suggestions about making the place look lived in and well cared-for are good too.

Try not too feel too vulerable on your own (I know how this feels too!) - I keep a personal alarm around the place just on the basis that it makes such a racket that I'd leg it if someone set one off somewhere near me - but it sounds as if you're reasonably safe indoors - good advice to keep the doors locked when indoors. I'd love to have a dog too but don't know whether the husband or cats would move out soonest. Snigger if you will, but I seriously considered one of these at one point! http://www.amazon.co.uk/X10-DK10U-Barking-DM10E-External/dp/B000KB2DFO. Cheaper to run than a dog and no poo bags required!

 

[Ushy M]

Forgot to ask - grateful if Gareth or Pford75 could point me in the direction of some guidance on the changes to permitted development that mean LBC is required to plant a hedge? (for pity's sake - I thought the changes to the planning system were intended to make less work not more!) Many thanks.

 

[CHRIS]

You could just buy them off! Maybe 2x crates of White Lightning a week would do the trick (nice fermented corn syrup).

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/White_Lightning_(cider)

http://www.britishcornershop.co.uk/britishfood.asp?id=AL0195

This may make them so ill they never come back - job done.

 

[worms]

Just to add to the "making sure that the place looks cared for" suggestion, I think it is important that even the tiniest bit of damage gets fixed asap. Don't ask me to figure how this works in the brain of a "ned", but somehow it does seem to reduce the rate of attrition.

 

[CHRIS]

Just to add to the "making sure that the place looks cared for" suggestion, I think it is important that even the tiniest bit of damage gets fixed asap. Don't ask me to figure how this works in the brain of a "ned", but somehow it does seem to reduce the rate of attrition.

http://www.theatlantic.com/doc/198203/broken-windows

 

[Pford75]

The place to find the latest guidelines on permitted development is on the Govt Planning Portal

http://www.planningportal.gov.uk/uploads/hhg/houseguide.html

I've already made a pigs ear of interpreting these once already....but i'll give it a go again :wink:

If a house is Listed, there are no longer any permitted development rights. This means that some things which previously would not have needed planning permission, may now require PP....for example, fences/walls/hedges

 

[JoceAndChris]

Enjoyed all your posts immensely; thanks for cheering me up! Interesting to see that you scratch the surface of British liberalism and you get that primeval desire for retributive justice. Shakespeare knew about the pain, misery, suffering and even death "children" cause. Romeo was banished.

Why have we gone so wrong? Other cultures don't stand for this kind of nonsense. Bring back the stocks and public floggings! (and yes, I'd have been there a few times myself)

 

[Edwardia]

We had a couple of geese when I was a kid and they are excellent guard dogs. BUT they have to be kept in at night because of foxes.

 

[Moo]

- and, if they're anything like the geese on our local golf course, they do poos that are just as big and messy as a dog's.

 

[Edwardia]

But on the other hand you don't need to mow the lawn, you get eggs and that's Christmas dinner sorted

 

[Pford75]

Poo as big as a dog....now that's bound to be messy :wink:

 

[yamin]

How about playing Barry Manilow CDs and Kenny Gee over a public tannoy???? Sorry, feel very sympathetic and hard to know what to suggest. In my opinion, dogs with appropriate fencing seems the best - not colditz fencing - as mentioned you don't want to look as if something to hide, but just 'fair enough, keep dogs in' type fencing. As for your husband - have to say, surely if you feel frightened and threatened and are alone a lot, it seems very unfair of him to then refuse to get something that would be so protective for you. And I vote for 'Jack Russell Terrorists' too!

 

[Cloudscape]

As said earlier in this thread, hedges start small, so aren't immediately apparent. What would make them more obvious is planting one species, at regular intervals. I'd like a bit more privacy along one boundary, so I've planted a variety of nice shrubs... all of which can also be used as hedging plants, funnily enough. There's no pattern to the planting. I'll do my best to keep them trimmed, but I'm very busy. :roll: