I think we'd all like to have a shop like this near us

[robgil]

anyway why is it called "bastard ashlar"?

Thats easy , because it is really hard to file through.

 

[fjpdesigns]

Actually there are two kinds of 'Bastard File'.
The first is the file that you can't find when you need it.
The second is the file that snaps when you have 95% of the job done.
There are also a number of other tools ( and medical conditions) with the same sobriquet.
I know. I also suffer in silence.

 

[Flyfisher]

Actually there are two kinds of 'Bastard File'.
The first is the file that you can't find when you need it.

That must be similar to the Bastard charger and Bastard spare battery for my cordless drill/driver. I can't find them anywhere. :evil:

 

[robgil]

Its not just tools , thers also the bastard remote for the telly that cannot be found when you switch the plug socket on and then get fleetwood mac banging one out at silly ''during the day when no one is trying to sleep'' volumes.
Thers another type of bastard which is what i was called by an abruptly woken Ms Robgil.

 

[Gareth Hughes]

And then there were the two Bastards who were responsible for this



http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bastard_brothers

 

[LadyArowana]

I don't like their shoes either, but I think you are being a tad harsh.

 

[Penners]

I suppose I should have known that including the word "bastard" (snigger-snigger!) in a post would unleash a flood of schoolboy humour. :roll:

Did you know that there's also a typeface called Bastard? It has several variants: Spindly Bastard, Fat Bastard, and Even Fatter Bastard.

You don't believe me, do you? Google it.

 

[philpjuk100]

Fat bastard? that must have been named after Mcguire minor! as the PE master used to say-
is that your body boy?
I would not have that body as a gift,
I would not give that body to my dog for his dinner.
IS THAT YOUR BODY BOY?

 

[Flyfisher]

Did you know that there's also a typeface called Bastard? It has several variants: Spindly Bastard, Fat Bastard, and Even Fatter Bastard.

OK, since you've thrown down the competitive gauntlet, I might as well mention a couple of similar examples from the world of professional music amplification:

http://www.ashdownmusic.com/bass/detail.asp?ID=229

and this, rather more 'in your face' example: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=by7nNwQe_Sc

Er, parental discretion is advised, though it's nothing as bad as what you may hear on Radio 4 these days. :shock:

 

[Penners]

Glossing over the manufacturers' desperate attempts to be cool and draw attention to their product... I had no idea that valves (I presume that's what "toobs" are?) were still used in amplificiation - or anywhere else for that matter.

Why? Why bother with all that heat and power consumption?

 

[Moo]

Why? Why bother with all that heat and power consumption?

That seems to be a cue for one of my favourite definitioins: If it can't be played during a power-cut, it ain't music.

 

[Penners]

You've been listening to my piano-playing, haven't you, Moo? It sounds exactly like someone playing in the pitch dark, and it certainly ain't music.

But I must disagree profoundly with your contention. Why should mere amplification remove the right to be called music?

 

[Moo]

Because it's unnecessary, and far too often it's taken to excess.
The only time I listen to 'live' pop music is if our son's playing, and I make a point of taking ear-plugs with me. I think it's significant that so many professional musicians use expensive custom-made earplugs at work.

 

[Flyfisher]

Amplification may not be necessary for a chamber orchestra performing to a few hundred people indoors but try the same thing at Glastonbury and few people would actually hear anything. Of course it's sometimes taken to excess (we lived about 4 miles from Knebworth when Deep Purple played there many years ago and we could hear them from home :shock: ) but a little bit of occasional excess is not such a bad thing is it?

Many professional musicians use earplugs because they are frequently exposed to loud music, unlike the audiences, much like workmen digging up the road would wear ear protection whereas pedestrians walking past them need not bother. Also, the "earplugs" worn by many professional musicians are actually in-ear monitors.

I had no idea that valves (I presume that's what "toobs" are?) were still used in amplificiation - or anywhere else for that matter.

Why? Why bother with all that heat and power consumption?

Audio amplification and high-power radio transmitters are, I believe, the last remaining applications where valves have significant advantages over semiconductors. Many guitar amplifiers use valves because their unique form of harmonic distortion when over-driven gives a particular tone that is not at all easy to achieve with semiconductor amplifiers.

However, the relatively recent development of affordable digital signal processors (DSP - a sort of microprocessor chip with additional circuitry to handle 'real world' things such as audio and video) has created a big market for "amp modelling" whereby the tone of the guitar is pre-shaped to emulate 'classic' valve amplifiers of yesteryear. Some modern semiconductor amps have DSPs built-in to offer a range of different 'emulations' at the touch of a button but, more often, such effects are added using foot-operated "pedals" between the instrument and the main amplifiers.

 

[robgil]

Toob amps just sound lovely, a nice warm kind of sound. Record players especially sound nice through a valve amp.

 

[Moo]

Amplification may not be necessary for a chamber orchestra performing to a few hundred people indoors

Nor is it necessary for a band playing to a hundred (or even fewer) people indoors, but they still insist on cranking the volume up to an ear-splitting level. It is not so much hearing as feeling the performance.

And that brings me to another beef:
I strongly believe that no-one has the right to prevent another person from listening to the music of their choice.
I believe, just as strongly, that no-one has the right to force another person to listen to music that is not their choice.
Muzac in shops and restaurants; music blaring out of house/bar/car windows; music festivals that can be heard over a four-mile radius....... In my book, these are all infringements of human rights.

 

[Penners]

Muzac in shops and restaurants; music blaring out of house/bar/car windows; music festivals that can be heard over a four-mile radius....... In my book, these are all infringements of human rights.

Now you're striking a nerve with me. The music festival thing I don't get too exercised about because it's such a rare occurrence, but muzac in public buildings sets my teeth on edge. The absolute acme of annoyance, however, is the thump-thump-thump of bass speakers from elderly Citroen Saxos and the like. I dream of carrying a pickaxe that I can plunge straight through the thin steel of the car doors and rupture the speakers inside.

 

[Moo]

Have you noticed that the cars (and houses, and bars....) that insist on 'sharing' their pleasures with the rest of us are invariably playing that thump-thump-thump stuff? It's never chamber music, or a piano sonata.

 

[Flyfisher]

You should start a counter-movement, Moo, and equip your car to blast our classical music. I think the idea of some high-volume Bach organ music would be a refreshing change.

"Ear-splitting" volume for even small 'rock' concerts is a little harsh as the volume levels are legally regulated, but I know what you mean and broadly agree, though it does rather depend on the music. A really favourite piece of music played at high volume does, in my view, add something to the emotion of the performance.

As for 'muzak', I would agree that it's the devil's own invention. But, again, there is a strong element of subjectivity involved. I presume they (whoever 'they' are) have to choose the blandest of the bland 'music' in order not to offend the vast majority of their captive audience - while totally missing the point, of course, that the mere presence of the 'music' is offensive enough.

I once stayed at the Hard Rock Hotel in Orlando and the 'muzak' was, to me at least, a rather enjoyable experience.

 

[Penners]

A really favourite piece of music played at high volume does, in my view, add something to the emotion of the performance.

Oh yes - some music is designed to be played VERY loudly. For example: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XJvNvBYTsGw