We're all going to die

[Penners]

I see that the Met Office has issued a Health Alert, which I feel obliged to pass on to you all:

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/topics/weather/7880092/Heatwave-alert-issued-as-sweltering-weather-sparks-health-warnings.html

Temperatures in the south and east could peak at 32 degrees C, over the weekend. You are therefore exhorted by the Met Office to lock yourself in an air-conditioned panic room at the core of the house, sit on a block of ice and pour buckets of chilled water over yourself. That way you might just survive until Monday.

I have an alternative prescription.

I suggest that we all down tools, mix ourselves enormous G&T's, sit under a parasol in the garden and ingest ice cream at two-hourly intervals.

We'll probably die, but we'll die happy.





This public information post is not intended for those of a northerly or
westerly disposition. You are apparently free from the mortal dangers
of heat and sunshine, this weekend, so can just get on with your work.

 

[worms]

Temperatures in the south and east could peak at 32 degrees C, over the weekend

Of course if there are problems in the south and east, I can always recommend visiting the north and west!

Forecast to hit a heady maximum of 13C in Ullapool this weekend!

Edit: Sorry Penners, I should have read the small print! Get on with work?! I'll be lucky to get the grass cut before the rain comes back on!

 

[robgil]

down tools? i have yet to pick one up today.
except my coffee.
i was going to do some work repairing some daub but seeing as its going to be scorchio perhaps i better not , now , where did i put my gin?

 

[Penners]

Forecast to hit a heady maximum of 13C in Ullapool this weekend!

Ullapool?! I thought that was about 1000 miles south of you. I'm surprised you can grow grass at all, up there amid the permafrost.

 

[FamilyWiggs]

There's nothing more pleasant than a balmy 18oC in Ullapool on a summer's day, when the news is full of pictures of Londoners sweltering in their cars stuck on the M25.

I must say Penners, I rediscovered Pimms last weekend, and found it an even better prophylactic against the mortal peril that is heatstroke than G&T. I completely forgot about my tools for a whole afternoon.

 

[worms]

ANY day in Ullapool is more pleasant than ANY day on the M25!

Penners, I've looked on metcheck and can't seem to find Thule! The distance between Met stations is directly proportional to the distance north of the M25 and even the Ullapool data is taken from a place that is nearer the east than the west coast! One weather site has a single forecast for the whole of the north of Scotland and anyone who has ever visited both Nairn and Skye will know that the two rarely share the same weather. So I'm afraid Ullapool was just the furthest north and west I could find (short of the utter hebrides).

 

[LadyArowana]

What on earth happened to the concept of a "beautiful Summer day"? I was hearing dire warnings on the radio yesterday. I had a very good chortle when they were emphasising the potential discomfort of an overnight low of 19 degrees, in my regular equatorial abode we put the aircon on at bedtime set for 24 !

 

[FamilyWiggs]

ANY day in Ullapool is more pleasant than ANY day on the M25!

Agreed. A heavenly part of the world.

 

[Flyfisher]

ANY day in Ullapool is more pleasant than ANY day on the M25!

ANY day ANYWHERE is more pleasant than ANY day on the M25.

FF jnr drove home yesterday from a week of camping and kayaking in Wales. I tried to tell him to avoid the M25 on a friday evening but would he listen? Still, he was only stuck on it for 4 hours so he probably got off lightly. :lol:

As for all the hot weather warnings, for goodness sake! Do people really need to be told how to keep cool? Talk about stating the bleeding obvious. :roll:
(Can I say that here? )

 

[Penners]

Penners, I've looked on metcheck and can't seem to find Thule! The distance between Met stations is directly proportional to the distance north of the M25 and even the Ullapool data is taken from a place that is nearer the east than the west coast!

Then you're even luckier than we are, out here in the Suffolk mato grosso. I reckon that the desirability of anywhere in the UK, as a place to live, rises as the square of its distance from the M25.

 

[Penners]

the bleeding obvious. Can I say that here?

You certainly can, along with any other grumpy expletive directed at the cretinous, moronic, brain-dead, fatuous, Elfin Safety nincompoops.

 

[robgil]

listen everybody , its summer outside so don't leave your homes , don't go to the sea side , don't go out and enjoy your garden , don't go for a cold one down the local beer garden , don't go for a lovely walk in the country side , don't put the roof down on your car and go for a pleasant drive to cool down , don't go swimming , stay in your homes, if you must do any of these or related activities do so at your own peril , above all though , DON'T HAVE FUN!

 

[LadyArowana]

Then you're even luckier than we are, out here in the Suffolk mato grosso. I reckon that the desirability of anywhere in the UK, as a place to live, rises as the square of its distance from the M25.

There are some rather nice places inside the M25

 

[Pford75]

Spent most of today up some scaffolding, against a south facing wall. Wearing a boiler suit (Now I know why it's called a boiler suit), and stripping paint. Boiler suit preferable to NB-410 splashed against a nipple (as happened yesterday).

At 5pm, I could take no more and asked Mrs F to hose me down in the garden.

If I'd seen this warning earlier, I'd have known it was hot and wouldn't have done something quite so silly in this weather.

 

[FamilyWiggs]

Good grief - I wonder how the Greeks, Turks, Cypriots, Italians, Egyptians, Ethiopians, Morrocans, Tunisians, Mexicans or Iberians manage. I count myself very lucky to have survived various heat-filled potentially lethal trips to those places! Someone really out to warn them how dangerous it is.

It's the Norwegian fjords only for me from now on. :roll:

I managed to stave off heat exhaustion and certain death today in the lovely gardens at Erddig whilst enjoying their children's festival. http://www.nationaltrust.org.uk/main/w-erddig It's a delightful Georgian country house and Victorian estate. It 's the kind of place I feel sure I was supposed to be born to in an earlier age. :mrgreen:

 

[Penners]

Good grief - I wonder how the Greeks, Turks, Cypriots, Italians, Egyptians, Ethiopians, Morrocans, Tunisians, Mexicans or Iberians manage.

They manage by being foreign - poor devils.

When the good Lord created the British, He did some of His finest work, by making us waterproof. He just failed to anticipate that we might sometimes have to withstand this ridiculously foreign weather.

But then nobody's perfect. :|