Get thee behind me

[88v8]

Still waiting after twelve weeks for the salvage yard to get their saw up and running so they can convert the lovely old seasoned oak I need to continue my garage.
Or.....
http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Replica-Wood-Mock-Tudor-Planks-/291244263411?ssPageName=ADME:B:SS:GB:3160

Ivor

 

[Penners]

Replica Wood planks are made from closed cell rigid polyurethane

Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

 

[Flyfisher]

Well, I suppose if you want to mock Tudor something you might as well mock it completely with a bit of plastic :lol:

I would have thought that some 6x1 pressure treated timber would be fine for a few decades and at a fraction of the plastic price.

Oh well, I guess there's a market out there for anything and everything.

 

[Zebra]

Replica Wood planks are made from closed cell rigid polyurethane

A friend has those. They're awful. They look quite convincing, then you tap them and they sound like a kebab takeaway box.

 

[Penners]

I'm actually quite proud of the fact that I have absolutely no idea what a tapped kebab takeaway box sounds like. :wink:

 

[Keithj]

What's a kebab takeaway box?

 

[LadyArowana]

 

[Flyfisher]

Being a man of the world (cough lightly, buffs fingernails) I am acquainted with these things called kebabs, though in my defence it was a long time ago and staggering home after a student night out, one's young and robust digestive system was more amenable to shavings from a lump of compressed floor sweepings from the local abattoir stuffed into pitta bread than it is nowadays.

I do try to keep up with modern culinary trends, but I have to say that Milady's photograph doesn't look anywhere near as appetising as pitta bread, even after making due allowance for the contents.

Who on earth comes up with these new foods?

 

[plasticpigeon]

I'm sure that m'lady only knows of the existence of such an item because of its importance in modern art!!

http://gavinturk.com/artworks/image/1303/

 

[LadyArowana]

I'm sure that's a very eloquent comment on the throwaway society and the impermanence of life as seen through the prism of a postmodern sensibility. However, even though it's a beautifully executed casting and a tour de force paint job, it lacks a certain witty resonance to me. I was rather keen on this other piece from the same website http://shop.gavinturk.com/products/tea-stain So keen in fact that I thought I might make myself one sometime in the next half hour, as the boys of Top Gear are fond of saying "how hard can it be".

 

[Penners]

I'm sorry but that's a forgery. It's clearly a coffee stain - Nescafe Gold Blend with semi-skimmed milk, if I'm not mistaken.

 

[LadyArowana]

"Exploring ideas relating to the artist’s signature, Tea Stain is a unique edition which shows both Turk’s recent presence but also his absence. The “mark” of the artist is a piece of ephemera which could either be treasured as a relic or discarded as waste. Meanwhile, Tea Stain also continues Turk’s interest in the nature of tea and its relationship to British heritage and colonialism but also tea breaks as the artist contemplates the blank page and the next idea begins to form."

So now instead of just spending time on assessment, we can also be making art.

 

[Penners]

... or talking b*ll*cks. :wink:

 

[middi]

... or talking b*ll*cks. :wink:

It's " bollockeros", Mr P :wink:

 

[Penners]

Spiacente, Middi! Mio Italiano è spazzatura!

 

[Keithj]

That was Español, surely?

 

[Penners]

Not when it comes out of Middi's mouth it isn't!